I was sitting outside yesterday, trying to relax and enjoy what’s left of this fleeting summer. When I found out I had cancer and was planning for my surgery I kept thinking, well the good news is, I’ll have the summer off! Hmm…little did I know that this summer would be anything but a vacation. We are now approaching labour day. Where has the time gone? TIME…now a “four letter word”. What time is it? Time to take some meds? Time to go to the doctor? Time for an injection? Time for some therapy? TIME to heal?!?!
As I sat outside, I was transfixed by a beautiful butterfly that was circling around me. It floated so effortlessly on the breeze and its majestic colours and grace took my breath away. Here was a creature that had started life looking one way and had transformed into something completely different. What was it like before its transformation? Was it happy when it was a caterpillar? Did it know beforehand that it was going to go through a life altering change? Did it find the struggle overwhelming? Was the evolution from caterpillar to butterfly painful? Was it difficult and lonely being cocooned away while its body changed? Was it confident that that its journey would end with something wonderful and unique or did it enter its metamorphosis with fear and doubts not knowing what the outcome would be? Was it more confident now as a butterfly than it was as a caterpillar? Was this new creature the “same” inside as it once was or did its entire being change along with its body?
Exactly how much TIME does it take?!?!
In my case, I haven’t been able to pin point a schedule for this journey. Some days I feel like I am doing very well and others, not so much.
TIME…Things I Must Endure. There is no set schedule for healing. It’s as unique as the butterfly I longed to be. My transformation is kind of backwards. Not that caterpillars aren’t nice in their own way, but I think we’d all like to end up as butterflies not the reverse. I do feel that I am still very much in a cocoon stage but I am starting to see light through the walls that have surrounded me for so many weeks. I have certainly changed and my transformation continues. There is still a lot more I must endure before my metamorphosis is complete. Will I emerge from this cocoon soon? One can only hope. Will I emerge changed forever? Most definitely. Exactly how long it will take…only TIME will tell.
President of As You Like It Marketing & Communications Inc. Award winning speaker and author. Breast cancer fighter and blogger. I’m sharing my journey…the good, the bad and the ugly. Hoping to help anyone else that has been touched by breast cancer be it you or someone you know or love.